What Works

Agreements

For any relationship to flourish there have to be agreements in place about how each person functions in relationship. Most of these agreements are unspoken and are only ever visited when a conflict or disconnection arises in the relationship.

How We Pick Each Other

Throughout human nature the feminine picks the masculine to be in relationship. This is a radical concept for most men to grasp and yet, I urge you to think deeply about it. This is especially difficult to see as in most male female relationships, the man has to ask the woman to “marry” him. (Smart women let men think that they picked them) So the masculine has the responsibility to pick the feminine back. Failure to do so will result in inevitable disconnection.

Being The Best You Can Be

Everything we do brings us closer together or further apart. Think about the impact of your behaviour on others, what connects you to another and what disconnects you.

Each person in the relationship needs to be willing to declare what it means "to be the best that I can be" and from there can both get and give the support to have this happen.
No one can do it alone – and only you can do the work.

Relationships are vehicles that provide the opportunity to look deeply at ourselves, unravel the mystery of who we are and create healing for the wounds we bring to our relationships.

Get Serious & Lighten Up

In relationship we need to get serious and lighten up.

Get Serious! - We need to be committed to the relationship such that we are willing to do whatever it takes as opposed to whatever it is we already know how to do.

Lighten Up! – We need to have a good time in relationship. This is about being committed to staying connected and having fun together.

Taking Responsibility

Each of us is 100% responsible for the experience of our lives today. We were not responsible for what happened to us as children. We are today.

Taking A Stand

In order to meet another in relationship we need to be willing to stand at the line. This means staying grounded while your partner is where they are so that you can receive them as they are. From this place, they can move and create a new reality for themselves.

Creating Safety

We can only open up to another when we feel safe in relationship. Creating a container of safety is critical to support each other on the journey into an Extraordinary Relationship.

Rules of Engagement

The Rules of Engagement for dealing with conflict need to be determined by each couple.

They might include such agreements as "You can leave the room by you can’t leave the building"; "No swearing"; "Anger can be expressed in front of each other and not at each other". Negotiating these are critical steps.

Relationship Vision

Creating a new relationship vision is essential. We are all headed somewhere. Play your hand in where you are going together. Both of you need to determine what you want together in order to move forward. This is different from your relationship goal.